I’ve Changed My Mind

noIf you are a mother, you will probably have experienced that time during the last month or so of pregnancy when you decide that you don’t want to go through with it after all. For me, it was during childbirth classes when they showed hard plastic templates of 1cm – 10cm holes. If they hadn’t followed up with a video in which it became clear that dilation meant being able to be stretched to 10cm and not just having a 10cm opening, I’m pretty sure I would have remained panicked until my daughter was actually born!

I guess that is where I am now. I have rationally taken in the information, I understand the upcoming treatment and its purpose. I have made plans for the day, what to take with me, what to do during the treatment etc. I just really don’t want to do it. I know I said in my last post that I was glad to be getting started, and really I am, but I would prefer not to.

I’m going to go with the theory that, just as childbirth may have been easier than I thought (well not at the time, but in retrospect) this probably won’t be very pleasant, but the resulting reduction of the cancer will be well worth it. Right?

4 thoughts on “I’ve Changed My Mind

  1. It will be worth it! Leave it in God’s hands, your faith will help you through it. Thoughts and prayers are with you Cathy💕

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  2. Many big hugs and lots of prayers are coming your way. Once you get the first time in it will become easier. It’s the not knowing what exactly will take place that puts that doubt in your head. You’ve got this! Be strong! ❤

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  3. Yes, worth it! You are worth it! You are strong and courageous!! Rise above this and win…your supporters will be riding this wave with you xx

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